CINDERELLA TRIPPIN'

….let there be shopping….

FEEL THE FEAR AND DROP OFF THE CHILD AT PLAYSCHOOL ANYWAY


 

English: Group of children in a primary school...

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7 DAYS BEFORE DROP OFF

1. THE LUNCHBOX

Assertive-yet-laid-back look ( green plastic ) . Check.

Child able to unzip backpack to get to lunchbox. Check.

Child able to get lunchbox out of backpack. Check.

Child able to open lunchbox. Check.

Child able to look pleased with contents of lunchbox confirming good parenting. Unknown. DAMN.

2. THE OUTFIT ( CHILD )

Easy pull- off pull- on underpants slightly too big so that child does not walk around school showing willy after going to the loo indicating bad BAD parenting. Check.

Neutrally cool looking pants. Check.

I-fit-in-yet-I’m-slightly-individual-T-shirt. Check.

Good-for-growing-feet-shoes indicating good parents with a good enough mutual gross income. Check.

3. THE OUTFIT ( MOTHER-DROPPER-OFFER )

Not yet confirmed.

4. SUDDEN UNSTOPPABLE SCRUTINIZING OF CHILD AND HIS MANNERS/LACK THEREOF

CHECK.

 

24 HOURS BEFORE DROP OFF

 

1. OUTFIT ( MOTHER-DROPPER-OFFER )

Control underpants. Check.

Purple cowlneck top indicating dignity and style. Check.

Black bootleg pants because was there ever any other working style? Check.

Earrings bought at Art shop indicating individuality and creative talent. Check.

Sunglasses indicating adequate gross income. Check.

2. SUPPLIES

2 rolls of toiletpaper. Check.

2 bars of soap. Check.

1 ream of drawing paper. Check.

1 bottle of washing up liquid. Check.

1 box of tissues. Check.

1 whiteboard marker. Check.

3.DOCUMENTATION

Immunization card, birth certificate, marriage certificate, ID. Check.

10 MINUTES BEFORE DROP OFF

Panicky all -over checking of child/backpack/lunchbox/outfit/supplies. Check.

Panicky last minute attempt at installing valuable life skills. Check.

Panicky attempt at not looking panicky. Check.

 

DROP OFF

DON SUNGLASSES.

SMILE and WAVE.

SWEAR UNDER BREATH.

 

 

 

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5 thoughts on “FEEL THE FEAR AND DROP OFF THE CHILD AT PLAYSCHOOL ANYWAY

  1. Great. I’d say I’m glad those days are over, but I guess after popping out another one, I’ll have something to dread or rather..look forward to in a few more years.

  2. Wait till you drop them at college or their first apartment :(

  3. Awww…I feel for you. I take it this is your first to go off into the big bad world? I’m curious though…the marriage certificate for documentation. Is that for you or your child? Wow…they let ‘em marry young there! LOL…

    By the way…I’ve awarded you a little something over at http://blendedbeaks.com Hope you can drop in and take a look.

  4. Excellent! Well done.

  5. Luddite lass on said:

    Good preparations for overcoming your fears. Remembering to make like the Madagascar penguins and smile and wave is the most important part.
    And the sunglasses are not a status symbol – they are to hide the tears until you are safely in your car and can have a good tjank!

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