DADDY MUST HAVE MARRIED YOU IN THE DARK
Everybody knows I’m not the world’s best waker-upper. It takes a good few Nescafe ultrastrongs to get me to a semi-conscious state in the mornings. And even then I’m inclined to communicate in grunts and uh-uh’s.
I wake up with bad hair and a bad attitude. Usually I manage to improve on both before 9h00.
On my non-working days things can remain shaky in the dress up and make up department.
I slip easily into a pair of sloppy track suit pants and an oversized T-shirt. The hair gets a quick spritz of water and a fast blow with the hair dryer and the face stayes bare. No one who is anyone is going to see me, right?
Enter 4 year old snarky male-in-the-making.
“Mommy, I’m going with Daddy today. ” ( suits me fine, my boy. You go farm with your father. )
But he is not done.
“Mommy, you don’t look smart today. Did Daddy marry you in the dark? ”
……….where in the world did he get THAT from??????
I shudder to think.
His grandmother up in heaven telling him to tell his mother to get her @#*&*% in gear?
Mmmmm……………she always WAS super conscious of looks and had a way of checking for weight gain with the flick of an eye…..